Another fortnight done

I'm running a bit late though.  Job hunting and an attack of mutant kitchen appliances have made stress relief more important than ever, too.

Anyway, to the numbers:

• weight: 96.9 (96.4) kg
• BMI: 28.3 (28.2)
• body fat: 27.4 (27.6) %
• muscle: 32.8 (32.7) %
• visceral fat: 12 (12) %

Not much change, which doesn't surprise me, given my current circumstances.

As my teachers usually said, Must Try Harder ...

Ye gods: three months done

Good progress too:

• weight: 96.4 (98.8) kg
• BMI: 28.2 (28.9)
• body fat: 27.6 (29.0) %
• muscle: 32.7 (32.0) %
• visceral fat: 12 (13) %

So my new lifestyle has so far made quite a difference:

• weight LOST: 6.2 kg
• BMI DROPPED: 1.8
• body fat DOWN: 3.5 %
• muscle mass UP: 1.9 %
• visceral fat DOWN: 2 %

 Plus I feel better; more alive and capable.

If I could just crack the knack of meditating ...

Two months and two weeks in

Somehow it seems longer than that: it's been a busy time!

I actually took these measurements on the morning of the 15th. 

• weight: 98.8 (99kg)
• BMI: 28.9 (28.9)
• body fat: 29.0 (31.0) %
• muscle: 32.0 (30.8) %
• visceral fat: 13 (13) %

Slow but steady progress...

Two months done

But what a fortnight...  At my last report I was on the dregs of a chest infection.  For this one I'm at the painful coughing stage of a cold.  In between, my employer was pushed out of business by a US software patent: we have plenty of prior art, but not the $750,000 (minimum) needed to prove it.  So instead of lawyers getting rich that's 6 of us on the dole.  Hi ho ...

Anyway, here's the numbers from the morning of the 1st June.

• weight: 99kg (100.2kg)
• BMI: 28.9 (29.3)
• body fat: 31.0 (28.9) %
• muscle: 30.8 (32.0) %
• visceral fat: 13 (13) %

Given the cold, I'm probably dehydrated, so those figures may be rubbish.  (I clean forgot to record blood pressure).

Walking: there's natural, and there's efficient

I'm finding out that many of the skills that come naturally are not optimal.  Walking is one.  Joanna Hall's technique is way more efficient than merely putting one foot in front of the other.  The follow-through with the ankle is a bit awkward when wearing work boots, as they (by design) support the top of it to prevent straining, and I admit to feeling a tad self-conscious swinging my arms like a child going choo-choo; but the technique works.  I hadn't realised how lax my 'natural' style had become.

Nasty factoid

"Every extra 10kg of body fat a man puts on will require 29km (18 miles) of blood vessels to serve the extra tissue..."

from page 85 of The Rough Guide to Men's Health.

Ways of knowing you are losing weight

Having your trousers fall down when sneezing.

Thankfully I was alone :-)

Sounds right to me

"With input from tablet computers, cameraphones, and walls of dancing video, and with much of your memory outsourced to Google and your social relations to FaceBook, you now embody the accelerating charge of the Five Horseman of converging technology - nanotechnology, biotechnology, robotics, information and communication technology, and applied cognitive science..."

Braden R. Allenby and Daniel Sarewitz in The Big Idea, New Scientist No 2812.

Six weeks in

Not a good fortnight, as the numbers show:

• weight: 100.2kg (no change)
• BMI: 29.3 (no change)
• body fat: 28.9 (30.6) %
• muscle: 32.0 (31.0) %
• visceral fat: 13% (no change)
• blood pressure: 125/80 @ 66 (122/83 @ 68)

Disappointing though the weight figure is, the raw number hides an interesting fact.  1.7% fat mass <=> 1% muscle mass.  Thus I'm still heading in the right direction; albeit rather slowly.

Probiotics seem to work.

Penicillin doesn't just kill the bad bugs.  Gut flora is clobbered too.  My bowels usually get unruly when I'm taking antibiotics.  This occasion was all too average in that respect.

At the end of the course I added a probiotic supplement to my daily regime.  Probiotic 10 from Holland and Barrett to be exact. 

I have a happy gut again :-)

Exercise: going green

This evening I moved up from the entry-level yellow resistance band to the next one up, in green.

I'm as knackered (and happy) as a month ago, after first using the yellow one. Progress :-)

Caution: politics looms

I've been silent here for several days.  Ideas aplenty have been drafted; and will stay that way until I've decided something.

Longevity will one day (soon, hopefully) get political.  It's already controversial.  The baby boomers are beginning to retire, threatening to overwhelm a social system established when people, on average, both bred faster and died younger. 

If ageing is cured when most of us are infirm, the politics could get nasty.  Hence I'm trying to work out whether anything I post might one day be used against me.

Exercise: variation

I'm finding it important to vary my routine. 

A "full set" (which I must admit to not quite having completed, though I've come close a couple of times) takes 4+ hours.  There aren't many days I can afford that much time.  More critically, it can get boring.  Very boring.  Like, realise during a set I've forgotten how many reps I'm up to boring!  Doing shorter stints of sub-sets avoids this.

The pattern I've fallen into is to do upper body + core + flexibility one day, long walk + flexibility the next, then lower body + core + flexibility, followed by a day off. (In practice it's often another walking day, but I don't feel guilty if it isn't).  Core exercises are done more often, as I discovered mine is particularly weak.

Gardening, decorating, and shopping, make excellent workouts too.  My wife thinks I'm mad shearing the lawn rather than using the electric mower, but it's an excellent upper body workout.  Likewise the sanding of paintwork.  Treating each stroke of the sanding block as a rep means I get fitter, and the prep' is way more thorough than I used to do.  Shopping makes an excellent lower body session, both from the walk and the avoidance of prams, toddlers, mobile using cyclists, and the like.

Initially it felt odd going against the labour-saving ethos of our age, instead trying to find innovative ways of expending more time and energy, but I'm feeling better for it, both physically and mentally.

Third metrics: one month done!

One calendar month on, how am I doing?

• weight: 100.2 (101.4) kg
• BMI: 29.3 (29.6)
• body fat: 30.6 (30.6) %
• muscle: 31.0 (31.1) %
• visceral fat: 13 (14) %
• blood pressure: 122/83 @ 68

Given that my exercise schedule has gone to pot since my last post thanks to a chest infection, those numbers aren't too bad at all.

Civilisation: the prime prerequisite

One thing that does seem certain: indefinite life is not going to be possible without the progressive interdependent socio-politico-economic system generally termed 'civilisation'.  I could, in theory, grow my own food etc. as a survivalist, but advanced pharmacology and medical technology are not products of subsistence.

Which is scary, given how many threats there are to our civil structure. Climate change, the demographic bubble, peak oil and phosphate -- and so many more threats.  Meanwhile the remaining Western superpower seems set on continental xenophobia and deliberate ignorance while the rising Eastern ones regard our hard-won individuality as an inconvenience.

Interesting times are ahead.

Yet my father put some perspective on these thoughts earlier this evening.  He was born in the Depression, schooled during WWII, fought in the Korean War, married my mother when The Bomb was expected to fall at any moment.  Keeping calm and carrying on is a rational survival strategy.  Worrying about the sky falling when you can't stop it is a waste of opportunity.

That said, becoming politically active is a Good Idea for several reasons; personal psychological health not the least of 'em!

Metrics: blood pressure

Daily measurements are not working.  Therefore I'll add them to my bi-weekly vitals reports.

Me: being indefinitely what?

Living indefinitely doesn't mean being human indefinitely - at least I hope not.

Being biological limits us to the surface of the Earth: every other place in the Universe (including of Earth) is hostile to us.  We have to consume other lifeforms to survive; which strikes me as bad mannered, if not outright unethical.  Our genes are programmed to kill us slowly by ageing, prevent us from regrowing severed limbs, and so on and so forth.  Amazing as this product of evolution is, my body is the ultimate limit to ambition.

If it wasn't for techtelligence 1.0 (i.e. our collective brain power) our species would have gone extinct millennia ago.

My current quest is to live long enough to gain choices.  What they may be is a matter of (often wild) speculation.  Which can be fun.  So this is a topic I will definitely return to.

---

There's a relevant track on this album: track 5 "i want to be a machine".

Royalty-free music for professional licensing

Fecal occult blood test

At the behest of my wife, who mentioned that my bowel habits had changed recently (for the better in my opinion!) I bought a DIY fecal occult blood test kit.  It detects hidden ("occult") blood in excrement, which is an indicator of several nasty conditions; particularly colorectal cancer.

(If I lived in Scotland I'd have been sent something similar by the NHS on my fiftieth birthday.  We English have to wait until we are 60.  Are we really more robust?  Or just poorer...)

Although I was confident that I had no bowel problem, I must admit to discovering that I'd been holding my breath until the test kit confirmed the fact.

Supplements: doing me any good?

Are the supplements I'm taking really doing me any good?  It's possible the positive effects I'm experiencing are just placebo, or follow from my healthier diet, or are due entirely to my exercise regime.  Finding out if they are worth my money and time will involve an experiment. 

Ideally I'd have a window into those alternate universes where I'm doing everything the same, except taking supplements.  Lacking that window makes the determination of their effect tricky.  Once I've hit my targets I could stop taking them, to see if anything changes; but that won't tell me if they're doing me any good right now.  From the perspective of my personal experience I have no means of knowing whether the supplements I'm taking are helping, hindering, or having no effect in the pursuit of my targets.

So I have no choice: I must trust something other than my personal experience. The options I can think of are:

• scientific literature on the topic
• respectable science reportage (e.g. New Scientist)
• claims made by legally regulated suppliers / manufacturers
• claims made by supposed users of specific products
• anecdotes from friends and colleagues

(As you can probably guess, that list is in my order of preference.)

None of these sources are entirely satisfactory.  The raw literature, when it is publically available at all, is generally written by professionals for fellow professionals: i.e. unreadable by us laypeople.  Hence New Scientist and similar publications fullfill a vital role; but they are subject to the journalistic paradox; i.e. the most important news is rarely the most interesting.  Suppliers and manufacturers of supplements have to be considered biased (and the more hyped the product, the more cynical I tend to be).  Reviews by users are seductive, but caution: are they what they seem to be?  Anecdotes from friends and colleagues are probably more reliable, if only because you have some knowledge of the opinionator. 

In practice, I'm bumbling along using as many of these sources as happen to be easily available at the point of decision.  It's a far from perfect approach...

Metrics: blood pressure

Another good reading: 115/79 @ 76.

It seems this habit of taking a measurement first thing is working :-)

Metrics: blood pressure

Good news today too: 111/79 @ 74.

Nothing is forever - again

Following on from my Third Week Blues posting, a friend commented that they find the prospect of having to watch their diet, taking loads of pills daily, and exercising regularly, indefinitely, daunting.

So would I, if I believed such sacrifice was necessary.

Eating well doesn't automatically imply boring.  There are tens of thousands of recipes I've not tried yet.  And no food stuff is banned as such.  A balanced diet can include the odd burger.  (A burger in each hand, however, is not balanced :-)).  Even so, in a few years time there will be injections of nanobots or a genetic modification treatment that stops our body's from absorbing every last calorie in our food.  Over-indulgence will still be morally (and ecologically) wrong, but the physiological consequences will be obsolete.

Supplements may be required for longer.  Fewer of them though, as DIY medical monitoring technology improves.  In a few years time there will be "labs on a chip" that analyse drops of urine or saliva to let you know exactly which supplements (and maybe drugs too) you need for optimum health today.

Exercise will not be mandatory forever.  As brain stimulation technology improves, it will be possible to exercise in our sleep.  Ultimately, if the Singularity happens, the very nature of having a body will change, making the concept of exercise itself obsolete.

In short, I'm convinced that whatever time and effort I have to dedicate to my survival now is not a life sentence.  Instead it's a phase that will pass.

Exercise: book

Although the Transcend book has a section on exercise, it's not a comprehensive one.  When I bought my resistance bands from FitMag I noticed them promoting a specialist book on the subject: Strength Band Training 2nd edition by Phil Page and Todd Ellenbecker.

It's excellent.  Recommended.

Metrics: blood pressure

Today I remembered - and the numbers are good: 112/75 @76.

Third week blues

The third week of any venture is usually hard for me.  This quest is no exception.  My new habits are not quite established.  The 'Doh!' moments when I realise I've not done something (e.g. blood pressure measurement today: didn't remember till tea time) is depressing.  Exercise has already improved my muscle tone, so I'm having to work harder and longer to get the same rush of endorphins.  The mood lift from having something new and interesting to do is becoming my new norm.  There is still a long way to go before the lean fit confident me in my mind is a reality.

Despite all this, dropping back into my old ways is not an option.  I do feel better.  People have commented that I look better.  I have more energy, so more time to do more of the things I want to do.  Sticking to my new lifestyle will, I believe, continue to improve my quality of living -- albeit at a slower pace than before.

This quest goes on!

Preventative Medicine: the economics

One of the most important factors to living indefinitely is detecting disease early.  This is especially true for cancer and cardiovascular disorders.  So why don't national health services and insurance companies insist on annual checkups for everyone?

One reason is cost.

Let's say there's a disease that 1 in 100,000 people will suffer from each year.  Treating that disease when symptoms have appeared costs £10,000.  Treating it early costs only £100.  A reliable test for the disease costs a mere £1.  Testing everyone annually will therefore cost £100,000, saving one person's direct suffering and £9,900 in treatment costs.

The decision an insurance company would make is obvious: don't do the testing.  Governments however have a more complex choice: performing tests will keep people in work and paying taxes rather than claiming benefits, for example.  Nonetheless it would be a brave administration that spent so much for the benefit of so few.

Would I personally spend £1 a year to make sure I'm not one of those few?  Of course I would.

Currently, real blood urine and saliva tests cost a lot more than £1.  In a decade or two there will be lab's-on-a-chip costing mere pennies; but until that time, the stark reality is that it's up to each of us to individually decide how much to invest in finding out how healthy, or not, we are.

Metrics: blood pressure

Another odd reading first thing today.  125/79 @ 55.

Second Metrics

A fortnight since I started this.  Let's see how I'm doing (initial figures in parentheses):

• weight: 101.4 (102.6) kg
• BMI: 29.6 (30.0)
• Body fat: 30.6 (31.1) %
• Muscle: 31.1 (30.8) %
• Visceral fat: 14 (14) %

Dropping 1.2kg while swapping 0.5% of fat for an extra 0.3% of muscle is good progress, in my opinion.

Suplements: suppliers

Food supplements are everywhere these days.  When I was a kid, the choice was cod liver oil (seen as old fashioned) and Haliborange (not as a range of stuff: just one product - seen as hip).  The supermarkets now have a stack of shelves dedicated to supplements.  Browsing our local Holland & Barrett shop made my head buzz.  Researching online, where sites like Healthspan and SimplySupplements abound, was worse.

Lots of research needed, methinks!

Meanwhile, based on the Transcend book's advice, I've chosen a multi-vitamin, Lecithin, and fish oil as a base to build on.

Metrics: blood pressure

121/79 @ 63 this morning.  Not bad.  Having a company meeting to go to rather than any 'proper' work probably helped.

Only two days to my next set of vital measurements.  Given that my belt has had to be taken in a notch, I'm hopeful of some good news there.

Exercise: walking boots

Standard boots tend to disintegrate on me.  The heels in particular seem to collapse after a hundred miles or so (about a months wear).

There's a branch of GO nearby. I popped in to see what they could offer. Much the same, or much more costly.  Not being confident that any available pair would last 1,000+ miles, I left.  Only to find our local Asda selling good ol' fashioned steel toecap workboots for £16.

Once upon a time, all too long ago, I worked full-time as a bar-cellarman in our then local. Steelies was all I wore for 4+ years.

Having just visited my dad, I'm pleased to say they are still as comfortable as they were then. And, as they have solid heels rather than fancy cushioned ones, there's a good chance they will last a reasonable distance.

Exercise: kit

The Transcend book introduced me to a kind of exercise I'd not heard of before: resistance tubes.  For less than the cost of a single month gym membership I got a starter kit from Fitmag Ltd.

When they arrived I thought the weakest band, and maybe the next one, would go unused.

How wrong I was!  Stretching the mid-strength of the five once was easy. Trying repeating the act a dozen times, holding the maximum stretch for a couple of seconds for each, was a humbling experience.  The weakest band is enough to make my muscles know they've been used; and I suspect will be so for at least a month.

Metrics: blood pressure

Today I did manage to take the measurement as intended: 125/82 @ 69.

That's very different to yesterday's 113/72 @ 77.  I suspect the difference is that I'm psyched-up before starting work. By lunchtime I've relaxed into the problem of the day. If the same pattern persists over the next few days I may rethink this practice.

Nothing is forever

One of my real-time friends has asked why this blog isn't titled "Eternal Me".

Because I don't believe eternal life is either possible or attractive.  Not possible, as death will eventually come about through disease, crime, misadventure, or natural disaster.  Not attractive, as the heat death of the Universe is likely to be dull dull dull.

Metrics: blood pressure

Another habit I'm struggling to establish. This morning I didn't recall my intent of taking this measurement before starting work until mid morning.  Must do better.

For the record, the readings then were 113/72 @ 77.

Habits: an observation

There's no such thing as will-power, only want-power.

Chewing food properly is almost a habit already.  I want to do it, as the experience is pleasant.  Those I'm struggling with, such as remembering to do stretching exercises, either have no immediate reward or are mildly unpleasant.  The trick with them, I'm finding, is to bring to mind what I ultimately want before and during the act, then reward myself for having achieved it. 

Just as well red wine, dark chocolate, and regular sex are recommended: gives me plenty of choice :-)

Another compromise with myself

Taking my blood pressure regularly is proving a hard habit to adopt. To be comparable, the measurements have to be taken in the same posture from the same arm at roughly the same time of day. This is proving hard to achieve, especially at weekends. So I've decided to try taking my blood pressure first thing in the weekday morning before I start work, and forget about weekends for now.

Supplements are not substitutes

The laziest part of my quest is taking food supplements. Their promoter's promise much (too much, probably) for the simple effort of swallowing a pill. The nominally crowd-sourced reviews on their suppliers web sites invariably glow with claims of positive effect; so much so as to set my cynical synapses glowing too.

Hard science on the efficacy of these supplements is much harder to come by. On the other hand it is an established fact that mammalian metabolism changes as we age. We modify the diet of our pets as they age. There are certain foods that I disliked as a child that I now adore, and v.v. A few traditional herbal remedies, such as St John's wort, have been well researched.  Others, such as ginkgo biloba, have credible, if controversial, reputations.

But which supplements to take, in what quantity?

Ideally I'd measure my nutritional input, have regular blood tests, and thus be able to make informed choices. But, as I have discovered, nutrition is a tricky subject: food labels generally don't include vitamin and mineral content, for example. Sites like NutriProfile help form a general picture of nutrition, based on statistics, but cannot tell me if I have a particular metabolic affinity or resistance for any specific substance. For that I need medical tests; but unlike supplements, they are not cheap. Package deals (e.g. here) are reasonable value as a one-off to establish a baseline. For monitoring purposes they are expensive overkill.  If I was rich I'd do it; but I'm not, so I won't.

So what will I do?

I've decided to be pragmatic. The medication I'm on through the NHS requires an annual blood test. I'm entitled to a copy of the results for a nominal fee. Until I get around to arranging that, I will start taking such supplements as research shows to be safe, and probably better than placebo in effect.

Research has already revealed one glaring Truth, as expressed in the title of this post: supplements are not substitutes. The bad effects of gorging on burgers, sweets, and cakes, cannot be countered by any amount of supplementation. Without a healthy diet, supplements are a waste of money and hope.

Is indefinite life possible?

A couple of my real-time friends have been asking why I believe living indefinitely is a real possibility. Isn't it instead a pseudo-religious reaction to my mother's death?

That it is a reaction to that event is undeniable. Is it a rational one is the issue.

One of my long-term habits is to add interesting books to my Amazon wishlist.  One such item was Transcend by Ray Kurzweil and Terry Grossman MD. Having become relevant rather than merely interesting, I bought it. The Introduction convinced me:

Until quite recently, progress in health was hit-or-miss. ... We lacked the means to design medical interventions for a carefully targeted purpose. ... But now this situation is changing -- and very rapidly.  ... healthcare has now become an information technology.... a key characteristic of [which] is very rapid exponential growth.

As a software guy I can see the truth of that.  Computers have transformed the world in my lifetime; from "Giant Electronic Brains" in air-conditioned rooms to a global network in my pocket.  My £99 smartphone has similar processing power and memory as my desktop machine had 10 years ago; and that cost £1,200.  Today that money would buy a PC with as many cores as a respectable data centre had then. 

(My wife is a living example too. She survived a critical illness in 2006 thanks to Drotrecogin alfa: a drug only available since 2001.)

Modern biology is more about crunching numbers than sloshing test tubes.  Hence the birth of companies such as BioProximity.  

Once drugs can be designed rather than discovered, the pharma' industry will experience (is beginning to experience) its own variation of Moore's Law. Aviation went from hopping a few metres along a beach to a return trip to the moon in a mere 66 years.  Human genetics had its first hop in 2000.  By 2066 (or 2045 if Ray Kurzweil is right) ageing will be curable. The trick is to live long enough to benefit; and that's what this quest is all about.

---

Despite the above, my core attitude is simple: what (of importance) can I lose? If all my efforts add not one second to my life, it will have been an interesting (and there is nothing more interesting to me than me!) journey.

Habits: some are easy

One habit I thought would be hard to shift has proven easy - because there is a reward.

Food tastes different and generally better the longer it's held in the mouth. Even soup. 

Habits: an all too long list

A lifestyle is largely a collection of habits. I've modified mine occasionally over the years, as circumstances pushed and pulled; i.e. jobs and relationships came and went. My 'style' was little more than the habit of least resistance.

Big change now, with a focus on maintaining my health; ideally improving it. To achieve which I need to change my habits:

• drop unhealthy ones
• drinking too much alcohol
• drinking too much coffee (decaf is still coffee)
• eating too much fat, sugar, and starch
• swallowing before chewing
• snacking (especially so when my wife is ill)
• slouching at the computer
• build new healthy ones
• drink more tea; especially the green variety
• eat more fresh food, ideally organic
• eat more fruit and veg' (but beware the sugar load)
• exercise regularly
• aerobic - walking by preference
• strength - resistance training ideally
• flexibility
• socialise more
• have an interest other than computery stuff
• keep the house cleaner (less load on my immune system)
• brush my teeth properly, and use mouthwash
• savour food, even when it doesn't need chewing
• improve posture; especially when working
• take appropriate supplements regularly
• monitor my vitals regularly

Phew! I'll probably think of more as soon as I publish this.

It ain't gonna happen all at once.  A one-at-a-time approach seems sensible. Some will no doubt be harder to drop and adopt than others. Watch this space...

Metrics: Blood Pressure

Today was so hectic I forgot.  Yesterday I measured 114/73 @ 69.  Not bad.

Incidentally the device I use is an Omron MX2 Basic.  When I first got it I took it along to my then monthly BP test at my doctor's to check its accuracy.  Which was to all intents and purposes excellent.

One habit I need to develop is writing at least one entry in this blog every day.  For the selfish reason that thinking of something to write will help keep my mind focused on what I am trying to achieve.

Metrics: Food Consumed - ON HOLD

I've decided to not attempt recording each mouthful for now.  It's not a hard thing to do: it is a hard thing to do consistently.  It needs to be a habit.

I'm coming to realise that achieving my prime mission of Indefinite Life mainly involves a fresh lifestyle; or, to put that another way, the formation of new habits. Regular exercise, for example, and taking supplements consistently, as well as recording consumption and many many other things. Each change is small - even trivial - but there are a lot of 'em.

This isn't the first time I've attempted a change of lifestyle. Turning 30 was one occasion; 40 another. On those occasions I dived in head-first, acting as if a lifestyle can be changed like a shirt.

Didn't work. It takes time to change a habit, during which period conscious effort is essential to its formation. There are only so many threads of thought that can be kept in mind at once. Therefore it's more effective to tackle these changes one by one.

Some changes are more important than others. Recording consumption is important, yes; but not a top priority.

Exercise: walk

Did my regular round-trip to visit my dad today.  According to WalkIt that's 13km, burning 876 calories.

Every little helps! (Though I did treat myself to some Green & Blacks dark mint chocolate - putting back 162 calories).

What is the point?

The question "What's the point?" is often really asking "What's in this for me?". (Which begs other questions; not least, who  - and what - is 'me'? Deep stuff. Or not.  Did "That's obvious!" spring to mind? Think about it ...)

It's my current belief (which may change, as it has several times before) that 'I' is the point. I actually am a point, in Time and Space. A place of Consciousness.

(Am I alone? It often seems so. Yet my very flesh sometimes acts the Stranger. My eyes drag my attention to some face, for example, or a muscle twitches for no purpose. 'I' am not a simple thing, to be described in a few words or captured in a brief video.)

My life has a point when I have some goal, a route there, and can see the next step. When I achieve that goal I will have to choose another; or life will have no point again.

Death is not a destination; it's an imposition. The point of living indefinitely is the maintenance of Choice.

It's not death I fear

It's not death I fear; it's the dying. 

Having watched my mother decline in a few months through illness into delirium, her actual death was a release. Her life had become a prison: physically incapacitated, her mind haunted by shadows. Visiting her in hospital became an unpleasant duty. Would she be pleased to see me, ignore me, or accuse "how could you?" over and over? My mum died weeks before her body stopped breathing.

Metrics: Food Consumed

The day isn't over, so these figures may need modification later:

• kcal: 2086
• protein (g): 66
• carbs (g): 212
• sugars (g): 61
• fat (g): 44
• saturates (g): 12
• fibre (g): 25
• salt (g): 6

My wife is ill, so my diet isn't as balanced as usual at the mo'.  Nonetheless that salt figure surprised me.

Metric: blood pressure

Blood pressure today was 124/72 @ 63.  Which looks to be close to my target, until I reveal that I'm taking enalapril maleate to control it.

As my weight falls and my fitness level improves, I'm hoping I'll be able to hit my bp target without chemical help.

First Metrics

First thing this morning, in just my undies but after using the loo, my metrics were as follows:

• weight: 102.6kg
• BMI: 30.0
• Body fat: 31.1%
• Muscle: 30.8%
• Visceral fat: 14%

These measurements are from  my Omron BF511 body composition monitor.

Quite a bit of work to do...

Today is M-day

That is, M for Measurement.  Today I start recording stuff that concerns my health and well-being.  This is so I can reach some targets:

• weight approx' 85kg (13.5 st for the Imperialists out there)
• blood pressure about 120/80 @ < 70 bpm without medication
• waist < 92cm  (36" ditto)
• consume < 2,500 kcal / day
• loads of other stuff...

Having reached the above I will generally be accounted healthy.  And I should be feeling pretty good too.  Then the hard work starts...

[The hardest goal has already been met.  I gave up smoking in 2003.]